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Top 9 Decisions That Would Be (Possibly) Worse Than Putting The UAE In Charge Of Our Port Security

9. Making Ted Kennedy the head counselor at an alcohol rehabilitation center for adolescent girls (Editor’s Note: I know the Ted Kennedy/drinking/sex thing has been done ad nauseum, but it just does not feel like a “Top 9″ list without that lovable, randy, sot).

8. Gigli II.

7. The life-sized Alan Colmes bobble-head doll.

6. Having Al Gore and Howard Dean co-facilitate an anger management class. In the Haliburton staff lounge. After watching both of Bush’s inaugural addresses. While Rush Limbaugh and Donald Rumsfeld sit in the back of the room and heckle them.

5. Purchasing a ticket years ahead of time for “Uday Hussein’s 50th Birthday Jamboree“.

4. Letting Susan Estrich sing “Mandy” karaoke-style at the Fox News mixer.

3. Caving in to San Francisco-based lobbyists and creating the new cabinet level position: Minister of Fabulously Dressed, Residentially Challenged, Demilitarizationalists.

2. (tie) Going against a Sicilian when death is on the line.

2. (tie) Getting involved in a land war in Asia.

1. Giving a clearly unemployed Wile E. Coyote an open line of credit at the ACME Corporation.

Discussion: Expose the Left, Michelle Malkin, All Things Beautiful, The Anchoress, Right Wing News, Captain’s Quarters   

Thanks to: Point Five, Argghhh! & The Conservative Cat

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This entry was posted on Wednesday, February 22nd, 2006 at 7:30 am and is filed under Conservative satire, Top 9 Lists. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.

Comments

6 Responses to “Top 9 Decisions That Would Be (Possibly) Worse Than Putting The UAE In Charge Of Our Port Security”

  1. Conservative Cat on February 22nd, 2006 11:15 pm

    Wednesday

    Suldog-O-Rama: Winter Carnival Of The Insane Gigolokitty!: Love Advice #1 Basil’s Blog: Headline News IMAO: War On Terror Greeting Card Scrappleface: Bush: Port Deal Provides Scapegoat in Terror Attack Cox and Forkum: Toonophobia Nose On Your Face: To…

  2. fd10801 on February 22nd, 2006 11:57 pm

    Wallace Shawn rules!

  3. Kath on February 23rd, 2006 5:37 pm

    Gosh I love The Princess Bride.

  4. Scotty on February 23rd, 2006 11:07 pm

    Getting captured by Jack Baur with your mistress of domination at her torture chamber and telling him you will never talk about where the WMD’s are.

    Interning for Bill Clinton with big boobs.
    Interning for Hillary Clinton and being a man (a real man not one of those liberal wimps)

    and….

    naming Jimmy Carter the secratary of defense.

  5. spurwing plover on February 24th, 2006 10:04 am

    1.Having Bill Clinton elected to UN secratary general 2.Having Hillary Clinton elected president 3.Having Sean Penn as american embassador to iraq

  6. HomefrontSix on February 24th, 2006 9:27 pm

    Now to lighten the mood a bit…





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