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Schilling to Donate Spleen to Science
Clearly annoyed by the attention Randy Johnson is getting for signing with the Yankees, Curt Schilling today held a press conference to announce that he will donate his spleen to science.
When it was pointed out to Schilling that no one has ever lived very long without a spleen, he replied, “I’ve done a lot of amazing things in my life, as you’ll see from the list I provided. Science needs more spleen research, and God told me that I should help.”
Schilling’s doctors, the same ones who used a bloody Boy Scout knot on his ankle ligament during last years World Series, were interested in giving the operation a shot. “It defies our years of training and the latest medical research,” said one doctor, reading from a script prepared by Schilling, “but if anyone can do it, Curt can.”
“Randy Johnson may want to pitch this year with all his internal organs,” Schilling continued. “But I challenge him right now to match me. It doesn’t have to be a spleen– a pancreas or gall bladder will do. But something important.”
Johnson was unavailable for comment.
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I’m sorry to tell you this, but people have their spleen removed all the time, and live to tell about it.
The Hall of Fame seldom asks to display the bandages afterward, however.
Fun site, by the way. I’ve added you to my “favorites.” Don’t you feel like a Yankee being patted on the ass by Steinbrenner?
Hey, this is so cool! So this is where you keep the Pulitzer material - LOL
Nice. I like it!