Author James Frey, best known for making up large parts of his alleged memoir A Million Little Pieces, stunned the literary community yesterday when he accused Kaavya Viswanathan, the Harvard student-author recently accused of plagiarism, of blatantly stealing his sensational fabrications. He has challenged her to a 3-round fist-fight to restore what he calls “my dignity as an estranged hack writer.”

Frey, who hasn’t been seen since his public execution on the Oprah Winfrey Show, spoke to a hastily convened news conference in downtown Manhattan.

“If you look closely, you’ll see that Kaavya’s first book, How Opal Mehta Got Kissed, Got Wild and Got a Life, closely follows the story arc of A Million Little Pieces,” Frey told reporters. “All this talk about her stealing from Megan McCafferty’s Sloppy Firsts is nonsense. Unless…..Megan McCafferty time-traveled from 2001 to 2003, stole my lies, returned to 2001 and wrote Sloppy Firsts. And if she did, then I need to kick her ass, too. Can she handle a knife?”

Frey says he’s working on a new memior about his recent decision to donate a kidney to a needy boy. The novel takes us from Frey’s kitchen, where he removed the kidney himself without anesthesia, to his struggles to get it to the hospital where the boy lay in critical condition. Along the way, he is forced to fend off gangs of kidney bandits with one hand while he holds his kidney in the other.

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