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Helen Thomas Convinced Fossil Remains of “Lucy” Are Her Long Lost Daughter
White House Correspondent Helen Thomas reportedly erupted in a startling orgy of joy yesterday when she saw the recreation of “Lucy,” a 3.3 million year old skeleton discovered in Ethiopia.
According to insiders who were able to decipher Ms. Thomas’ grunts and squeals, Lucy is the spitting image of a baby the famed reporter gave up for adoption when she was a teenager.
“I’ve never seen Helen quite like this,” said one anonymous colleague. “She was squatting in her chair and pointing at her computer screen, yelling, ‘LUCY MY BABY! WE MUST RING THE BELLS! LUCY MY BABY!’ It was highly emotional.”
Colleagues tried to calm Ms. Thomas by stroking her hump, but nothing seemed to work. She was finally sedated by Secret Service agents.
- Helen Thomas Convinced Fossil Remains of “Lucy” Are Her Long-Lost Daughter
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- Sheehan’s “I Love Lucy” Remake Falls Short
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on Friday, September 22nd, 2006 at 11:05 am and is filed under Potfry's Archives.
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That is wicked good. I love it!!
Yeah, baby!!! Just found your site. I can’t believe I’ve missed it all this time. You got my vote on RCP.
I wonder how many tranquilizer darts it takes to bring down a Helen Thomas?
It seams that crack-pot scientists DONALD JOHANSEN named in LUCY becase the song Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds LSD was playing on the radio nad how can these wackos prove what this criter looked like and how can they tell it it was male or female i mean its so rediclous its time this recent NATIOAN GEOGRAFAKE findings which loks to me like shaved oragatang its time when back when the same bunch claimed they found this missing link between BIRDS and REPTILES and showed a model of the supposed creature which later turned outt o be a fake and this LUCY is also a fake created by some crack-pot and we all know that LUCY is realy LINUSES big sister and plays on CHARLEY BROWNS baseball team
OMG OMG OMG OMG (running to the bathroom)
“I wonder how many tranquilizer darts it takes to bring down a Helen Thomas?”
Only one, but you gotta find a soft spot. — Good luck on that one sucka.
Perhaps deportation to Ethiopia would be in order. Or, a simple gunshot. Either way, she’s long past the point of needing to be removed from the country that she hates.
RE: fossils
Fossil Find Is Missing Link in Human Evolution
http://beepbeepitsme.blogspot.com/2006/09/fossil-find-is-missing-link-in-human.html
wow. this is so emabarassing. you “people” really think this is clever? I feel so sad for you. My heart breaks for you. I forgive you. Clearly you were not able to understand the responsibility that comes with PRIVILEGE of the voting for your own leaders.
lazy, and cheap pot shots at a woman because she’s on in years and has worked hard all her life? i don’t agree with her all the time, but i like the fact that she asks hard questions. WHAT ARE YOU UNIFORMED ‘TALKING POINTS’ PUSSY ASS CORPORATE MONOLITH SUCK-UPS AFRAID OF…. reality?
Don’t know much bout corporate mono-whatever, yerallnuts.
And who are you “people?”
We just think it’s freaking funny.
You should try some decaf, bub.
We do have quite a few old fossils in the goverment just look at TED KENNEDY
yerall, how dare you put reality and the Left in the same thought, much less Helen Thomas? That’s blasphemy!!
Honey, we’re all related to “Lucy,” except Pat Robertson…