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TNOYF Exclusive: New Transcript Of Tony Snow’s Press Conference On Laura Bush’s Cancer
Full transcript follows:
Q: Tony, can you tell us about Mrs. Bush’s skin cancer? Is she going to be okay? How does she feel?
Mr. Snow: I spoke to her just a short time ago. She is doing fine and she thanks you all for your concern.
Q: That is good news. Two part follow up: Is it contagious? Could those around her contract it?
Mr. Snow: I am not a doctor but I do not believe that it is contagious. No. Those around her are perfectly safe.
Q: Hmm. So you don’t think there is even a remote chance that even those closest to her could possibly catch it?
Mr. Snow: I do not believe so. No.
Q: What if it was the person that she shares a bed with? Could that degree of proximity make it more likely that the disease could be spread?
Mr. Snow: No. It is not something you catch.
Q: Did she catch it after Vice President Cheney shot her on that hunting trip?
Mr. Snow: What ?!? No!
Q: So you admit that Mr. Cheney shot her?
Mr. Snow: No! Next question.
Q: My sources say that this form of cancer is quite prevalent in the homosexual community. Do you think she caught it from Vice President Cheney’s lesbian daughter?
Mr. Snow: Look, Mrs. Bush has squamous cell carcinoma. It has been detected early and she is being treated. She is not in any danger at this time. It is not- I repeat- it is not contagious. So President Bush is perfectly safe. I’m sure he thanks you for your concern over his well-being. Any questions that are not related to President Bush catching cancer from his wife?
Q: Did the First Lady receive a full medical work-up as part of her screening?
Mr. Snow: Thank you for changing that line of questioning. Yes, she did indeed have a full battery of tests done.
Q: Were there any other potentially life-threatening contagious diseases discovered?
Mr. Snow: No. She was given a clean bill of health.
Q: Nothing? No tuberculosis? Smallpox? Maybe a touch of Ebola?
Mr. Snow: (Sighs) That concludes this conference. Good day.
Q: You wouldn’t happen to know if President Bush has been dining out with any former Russian spies do you?
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Cruel very cruel - but fair
Litvinenkoo would be rolling in his leadlined coffin.
The White House Press Corps is a bunch retarded hyenas chasing their tails.