More Little Known Jack Bauer Facts

If Jack Bauer crawls out of an air-conditioning duct and sees his shadow, it means that there will be 24 more hours of terrorists getting s***-hammered.
Jack Bauer’s nickname for Chuck Norris is “Aloysius Q. Vagina-Muffin”.
Under intense interrogation by Jack Bauer, the fifth dentist cracked and admitted he recommends Trident for his patients who chew gum.
Jack Bauer actually wrote an episode of Three’s Company in which there was no misunderstanding in the plot.
On Jack Bauer’s say-so, the film Gigli would cease sucking.
Jack Bauer helped U-2 find what they were looking for.
Coffee cannot start it’s day without being drunk by Jack Bauer.
GI Joe plays with a Jack Bauer action figure.

Thanks to: Mudville, Point Five, Wizbang

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This entry was posted on Wednesday, January 25th, 2006 at 7:35 am and is filed under Jack Bauer. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.

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5 Responses to “More Little Known Jack Bauer Facts”

the man on January 25th, 2006 12:09 pm

The 24 PS2 Video game has no cheats since the Jack Bauer character never reloads or dies.
Hoodlumman on January 25th, 2006 9:57 pm

These are awesome… and I’ve never watched 24.
buckley on January 25th, 2006 10:28 pm

Thanks Hood.
MacStansbury on January 27th, 2006 10:16 pm

• Vampires die (uh, more) upon drinking the blood Jack Bauer
• Jack Bauer would be impervious to lightning, if lightning was dumb enough to mess with him
• Chocolate in peanut butter? Peanut butter on chocolate? Yeah, that was Jack Bauer’s doing
• Jack Bauer has no need for kung fu. Judo chops are for girls, like that Bruce Lee
• Jack Bauer heard about lightning trying to start something, and tore lightning’s head clean off
• Jack Bauer got turned down for a date once. Once.
• Jack Bauer reduces plaque by 25%
• Remember that time Jack Bauer told a joke that wasn’t funny? Of course not, he’s the greatest joke-teller in the history of man.
• Jack Bauer’s tears cause cancer
• Guns don’t kill people, Jack Bauer kills people
MacStansbury.org on January 27th, 2006 10:20 pm

More Little Known Jack Bauer Facts

Posted these over at The Nose On Your Face (yes, Im bored)
• Vampires die (uh, more) upon drinking the blood Jack Bauer
• Jack Bauer would be impervious to lightning, if lightning was dumb enough to mess with him
• Chocolate in peanut bu…

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More Little Known Jack Bauer Facts

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