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Cindy Sheehan Gives Al Qaeda Response to Bush Address
Following is the transcript of Al Qaeda’s response to President Bush’s address Wednesday night, delivered by Cindy Sheehan, famed anti-war protester.
“Tonight I address those suffering in the police state formerly known as America.
You know me as Cindy Sheehan, the Peace Mom. You’ve seen me sleeping in tents, chained to the White House, hugging my only male lover Hugo Chavez, and enduring hunger strikes while magically sustaining my weight. You’ve watched as I’ve transformed from church-going PTA Mom with an internet porn addiction to radical revolutionary with an internet porn addiction, all without significantly altering my hair style.
Tonight, though, I address you as Al-Cindy Muhammed Fatwhinee, newest member of the peace organization Al Qaeda. These freedom fighters invited me and my recently transgendered traveling partner Pat (now known as Al-Pat Muhammed Looslabia) here to Iraq so we could see, first hand, their super-human efforts to stop the bloodshed that has claimed the lives of some 7 billion Iraqis. It has been an eye-opening visit. They showed us the woodchippers the American soldiers use to puree Iraqi babies. They showed us photos of American soldiers playing soccer with the heads of Iraqi women. And they showed us an amazing website devoted to the amorous bond between a well-endowed Al Qaeda member and some native livestock. Can you say “bookmark?”
But the real reason I am speaking to you tonight is because these fine, fragrant people have asked me to respond, on their behalf, to the address given Wednesday night by President Bush. In return, they’ve promised to make me a special lamb and cous-cous smoothie and allow Al-Pat and I to watch the camels mate.
So it is with heavy heart and persistent vaginal itch that I address you. Your Fuhrer, George Bush, has decided that 21,000 more killers should be dispatched to this land, where Shi’ites, Sunnis and Kurds try to live peacefully together (Incidentally, I’ve found the Shi’ite women to be particularly skilled lovers, while the Sunnis are quite shy. The Kurds taste like Cream of Wheat.)
I beseech these 21,000 young men and women, all taken against their will and force-marched through training that involves hatchets and kittens, to put down their arms upon arrival in Iraq and join the revolution. I promise you refuge under the banner of Al Qaeda. We will give you a new name, an animal of your choosing, and unlimited internet access. You will quickly feel the power of the revolution, and the roaming hands of Al-Pat after she’s had too much apple brandy.
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Here is a more worthwhile and informative response:
“The problem with the war in Iraq is that it provides very welcome material for those who argue that America and her allies are fundamentally opposed to any kind of unity and prosperity in the Islamic world. The Islamic militants see their struggle as a defensive one. They believe that they are resisting a tradition of belligerence and aggression by the West that goes back to the Crusades. Unfortunately, attacking — however justifiably or not — two Islamic nations in the space of two years, one of which is the cultural heart of many Islamic or many Muslims’ and Arabs’ cultural identity, that clearly is going to provide evidence for those who believe in that world view.
The point here is that if you accept that bin Laden and his close aides are not solely responsible for global terrorism, and that far more profound and widespread factors are at work, involving ideology, world views, a way of seeing international relations, relations between the West and Islam, and so forth, then though you may have halted a potential threat, you’ve created something that’s far more dangerous by doing so.”
“I think the term al-Qaeda, particularly now, is of dubious use when trying to describe the phenomenon of contemporary Islami Suni Muslim militancy. Al-Qaeda is commonly perceived to be a tight-knight terrorist organisation led by bin Laden. Something that comes close to that description existed in Afghanistan between around 1997 and 2001. That entity no longer exists.
What we have now is something far more diverse — a whole series of groups, cells, and even individuals who are dissimilar in many ways, but are united by certain fundamental ideological ideas, and a particular way of viewing the world. Broadly, if you want or if you need an al-Qaeda as a label, then I think it should be applied to that broad movement, rather than one specific group. I think if you continue to conceive of the threat from militant Islam as coming from one specific group, then attempts to end that threat are likely to be misjudged as a result. And tactics based on this assumption could — at the very best — prolong the war against terror or a victorious war against terror, and at the worst could be counter-productive.”
Jason Burke, Author of “Al-Qaeda: Casting a Shadow of Terror”
A BUZZFLASH INTERVIEW, October 9, 2003
As Burke reviews, Clinton’s 1998 bombings of Sudan and Afghanistan created bin Laden as a symbol, forged close relations between him and the Taliban, and led to a sharp increase in support, recruitment, and financing for Al Qaeda, which until then was virtually unknown. The next major contribution to the growth of Al Qaeda and the prominence of bin Laden was Bush’s bombing of Afghanistan following September 11, undertaken without credible pretext as later quietly conceded. As a result, bin Laden’s message “spread among tens of millions of people, particularly the young and angry, around the world,” Burke writes, reviewing the increase in global terror and the creation of “a whole new cadre of terrorists” enlisted in what they see as a “cosmic struggle between good and evil,” a vision shared by bin Laden and Bush. As noted, the invasion of Iraq had the same effect.
Burke concludes that “Every use of force is another small victory for bin Laden,” who “is winning,” whether he lives or dies. Burke’s assessment is widely shared by many analysts, including former heads of Israeli military intelligence and the General Security Services.
We can help the vanguard mobilise this reservoir of support by violence, or can address the “myriad grievances,” many legitimate, that are “the root causes of modern Islamic militancy.” That can significantly reduce the threat of terror, and should be undertaken independently of this goal.
Somebody pass Rhoderick, the cut-and-paste queen, a drink. Sheesh. Can you imagine this guy at a party?
Rhoderick-what are you on,pass some to me and let me get crazy too.If I were you I’d go to rehab!Fast.
I love this guy’s idea that every time we use violence to kill Jihadis, Osama wins! I hope Osama wins big big big time and that, next Thanksgiving, the turkeys declare that they’ve won a huge moral victory!
I would love to respond to some of these leftist comments if they actually made any sense. Turkeys and Thanksgiving? These moonbats have clearly upped their dosage of anti-depressants lately….
Sunday Funnies
Cartoon courtesy of faithmouse
The Nose On Your Face: Cindy Sheehan Gives Al Qaedas Response To Bushs Iraq Speech
If you havent seen Saddams catgo over to Aces.
Dr. Sanity has the Carnival of Insanities!
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The leftists are the ones who often orgainize these antiwa protest in fact the KGB were behind many antiwar protests in europe in the 1980s it had little with the dove and more with the vulture