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North Korea Agrees To Shut Down Nuclear Plant in Exchange for Food, Fuel, and Lindsay Lohan
After weeks of six-party negotiations, North Korea said they would shut down their nuclear plant last night after the U.S. agreed to include Lindsay Lohan in the deal.
The last minute inclusion of Lohan, who in an exclusive TNOYF interview said she was ”like, totally freaked out,” represented the culmination of tense back and forth 11th hour negotiations driven by the need to appease Kim Jong Il’s desire for an American celebrity to call his very own.
According to insiders, Jong Il originally wanted 13 year old actress Dakota Fanning, and the U.S. countered with all Three Dixie Chicks. In an apparent effort to break the tension, Assistant Secretary of State Chris Hill jokingly offered Madeline Albright, prompting the North Korean delegation to withdraw from the talks for several hours in protest.
The U.S. has also apparently agreed to sweeten the deal with a vile of Michael Jackson’s saliva, the entire unedited collection of the Dirty Debutante porn series, and the dried spleen of Sonny Bono.
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North Korea Agrees To Shut Down Nuclear Plant in Exchange for Food, Fuel, and Lindsay Lohan…
After weeks of six-party negotiations, North Korea said they would shut down their nuclear plant last night after the U.S. ……
I say make the trade,were on the long end.
Fuel? Yeah. But who needs food!
Kimmy Jung nibbling on (a shiny and new) Lindsay’s relevant bits, with a pair of chopsticks, is a lewd, yet strangely entrancing vision, that I cannot and won’t share with fellow readers.
Oh the explicitness!!!
Pete
(dribbling)
Oh great.
Now we have to throw in Cristal as well…..