International film mega-star Tom Cruise has come under fire recently for an increasingly erratic pattern of behavior that has been described with words ranging from “quirky” to “downright bizarre”. 

Cruise first raised some eyebrows when he appeared on Oprah Winfrey’s talk show last year and, in the words of one anonymous production assistant, “bounced around like a retarded gibbon who got into the Jolt cola stash.”

The Mission Impossible star followed up his stint on Oprah with a promise to eat his newborn child’s placenta, causing not a few movie fans to long for the halcyon days of Hollywood when more normal actors like Gary Busey, Jeff Goldblum and Christopher Walken had the lion’s share of the spotlight.

However, even the most die-hard Tom Cruise fans are saying that the actor’s latest action has crossed the proverbial line.

That line was crossed when Cruise appeared on The Ellen DeGeneres Show last week to bid farewell to his infant daughter Suri before sending her on what Cruise termed “an Odyssey of discovery to the planet of my inception: Zarkon-5.” The actor then loaded the child into a pink, single-propeller, space transport and waved good-bye as she headed skyward.

Cruise was quick to dismiss concerns over Suri’s re-entry into America on the return leg of her trip noting that her “dark, Mexican-like features”, “lengthy rap-sheet” and “lack of legal documentation” will assure that she makes it home in a timely fashion.

Related posts 

1. Tom Cruise Uses Scientology to Aid Car Crash Victims
2. TomKat Wedding Marred By Space Alien Melee
3. Cut Loose By Paramount Puctures, Tom Cruise Plots Revenge
4. Tom Cruise/Katie Holmes Wedding Vows
5. Individual Who Created New Toy Packaging System Must Go