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Counterpoint: The Racial Politics Of Plus-Sized White Women
GUEST EDITORIAL BY IKE TURNER
I have been following the case of the illegal immigrant who recently scurried back across our southern border with his delightfully curvaceous junior high teacher with great interest.
Some have suggested that this is simply a case of true love that should be encouraged rather than condemned, and that the criticisms of the couple stem from pure racism, as the young man in question is a Mexican national.
Others, like the reprehensible Mr. Potfry, have opined that this is simply one more example of the need for far more relaxed immigration policies, as this “Latino-ager” was merely one of many undocumented citizens who are “doing the fat women that Americans will not do.”
Hogwash. First of all, they’re called “illegals” because they are here… anyone? That’s right. Illegally. If I hear any more junk about “undocumented citizens” I’m liable to go “Old School Ike” on somebody’s ass. Ask Tina how much fun that is.
But more to the point, off the top of my head I can think of at least fifty out-of-work brothers who would hit that without taking her and her considerable assets (financial and flesh-toned), south of the border. When you think of it in those terms, “doing the fat girls Americans won’t do” sounds an awful lot like “doing the fat girls white Americans won’t do.”
What about the way that the lax enforcement of immigration policies is affecting African-American men? Will no one stand up for my people’s right to some plus-sized Caucasian love?
Does that make me racist? Nationalistic? A patriot? Damn straight! But even more than that, it makes me an unapologetic lover of all those pale-skinned, Reubenesque lovelies. To paraphrase the noted poet Sir Mix-A-Lot: “36-34-36? Ha ha, only if she’s 5′3″.”
And to the ladies out there I pose this question: why go out of town for a little ol’ taquito, when you can get the burrito grande supreme right here at home?
POINT, BY R.H. POTFRY: ILLEGAL MEXICAN TEENAGERS ARE DOING THE FAT TEACHERS AMERICAN TEENAGERS WON’T
- Point: Illegal Mexican Teenagers Are Doing The Fat Teachers American Teenagers Won’t
- Reid On Racism, Poor Crop Yields And Chimichanga
- TNOYF Exclusive: Extended Ted Kennedy Transcript From DC Immigration Rally
- “Million Juan March” Tops List Of Suggested Names For Recent Immigration Protests
- Pig-Latin Americans Fed Up, Protest For Their Rights
I have to say that Ike has a point. To find the root of the problem you have to go back to the days of busing. See, when we were busing inner city black kids into suburban neighborhood schools and vice versa, then we had enough of a mix in culture to ensure that all of the moon-faced heifers were well taken care of. But now that busing is a thing of the past, these full-sized Athenas are left searching for kids to fulfill their desire and are left with the uppity white kids who are looking for something slimmer or the illegals who don’t care. If we could just bring back busing, all of this mayhem would cease.
It’s that sort of insight, Murphy, that makes all our editorial work worthwhile.
HAHAHAHAHA
I’m just here to help. Keep ‘em coming.
OH…
MY…
GOSH…
CANNOT…
STOP…
LAUGHING…
I’d link to this brilliance, but I think I’ve used up the maximum number of links this year IRB allows me without declaring a fatwa on me…
And I understand that fatwa does not call for my death, but rather having to take the 2nd turn with Kelsey Peterson…
Right on brother! USA! USA!
That’s it. I’m hanging up my quill. Potfry, you guys are truly number one. I’m laughing my ass off here. But, you did make me feel deep sympathy for brother Ike’s victimhood. Maybe a new government program is needed to help other brothers like Ike who are being harmed by this dire situation.
well huh! so let me get this right. if i want to get laid by a ehum “person other than white” i need to start eating? LMAO you guys rock!
They moved the sailors out of San Diego, shut down Air Force and Army Bases and to what result? Nobody to service the Albino Porkets.
That gap was filled by our brothers of “color” wishing to be seen with white “arm jewelry” to be used and passed on as a status symbol.
Our Mexican brothers get it all in one, including a chance at citizenship, plus they’re used to dining on pork. Win-Win.