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Point: Illegal Mexican Teenagers Are Doing The Fat Teachers American Teenagers Won’t
EDITORIAL BY R.H. POTFRY
The case of a junior high school teacher from Nebraska who fled to Mexico with her student/lover has captivated the press for the past few days, and at first blush, it bears the hallmarks of your typical teacher/student tryst: a 25-year-old female teacher and 13-year-old male student on the lam with a duffel bag full of condoms and hope.
Yet, under closer inspection, this tryst is anything but your run-of-the-mill statutory rape case. You see, the 13-year-old boy, Fernando Rodriguez, is an illegal Mexican immigrant. And his abductor, Kelsey Peterson, is a moon-faced heifer.
Why is this significant?
Studies show that as more and more female junior high teachers bed their male students, a critical shortage of teenage boys looms. And, as natural selection takes effect, it will be the stouter educators who are first to feel the marketplace pinch. Indeed, as their willowy co-workers get the pick of the adolescent litter, the chubbier spinsters will be left to choose from the mostly pre-pubescent Chess club, or forced to take that job as assistant softball coach in order to find love on the other side of the aisle.
Enter the illegal Mexican teenager.
The Peterson-Rodriguez case illustrates that, not unlike cutting lawns, schtuping the fat teacher is another unsung job that Americans shun, but Mexicans are willing to do. But instead of allowing this marketplace transaction to occur naturally, our short-sighted immigration policy calls for the return of a virile young bandito like Fernando Rodriguez to Mexico, rather than allowing him to supply Large Marge with the undocumented love she demands.
We call for the immediate return of Fernando Rodriguez to the United States. It is our hope that he becomes a symbol of the free market economy that this country was built on: the Elian Gonzalez of the beef-trolling set, so to speak.
COUNTERPOINT BY IKE TURNER: THE RACIAL POLITICS OF PLUS-SIZED WOMEN
- Counterpoint: The Racial Politics Of Plus-Sized White Women
- “Million Juan March” Tops List Of Suggested Names For Recent Immigration Protests
- Two Years Later, Infamous Student-Teacher Tryst Still Helping Ugly Teachers Get Laid
- LA Immigration Protest Leaves Millions Of Yards Poorly Groomed
- “Remember Montebello!” or The Top 9 Reasons That Students At California’s Montebello High School Walked Out Of Class And Put The American Flag Upside Down And Beneath The Mexican Flag (Besides To Protest The Proposed Federal Immigration Bill)
A young female bovine is a heifer, not a heffer. Although that is exactly the way it sounds. Just thought you might like to know.
um yeah - I think I will have to send this link on to a few people I know. Goodluck on the web award thingy.
Thanks Jerry. “Hooked on Phonics” had it spelled the other way.
“…the chubbier spinsters will be left to choose from the mostly pre-pubescent Chess club…”
This one of the 69,890 reasons I love you guys and this site! You address the gray matter.
PS. Hey Potfry, as of Sunday night, I finally moved in to triple digits!! There IS a God!!!
LK
I really need to put a sneezeguard on my monitor. I’ve lost count of all the monitors you guys have made me fry due to Diet Coke spraying!
Perhaps this can be a method for repatriation of the illegal Mexicans and could bve community servicde for those starry eyed school teachers.
Heard Al Gore on the radio this morning, he says that tropical diseases are coming north because of global warming, hell, I thought it was just those illegal Central America invaders who skip the health screening.
That’s just great, now the pro-amnesty folks have a new special interest group on their side: Butter-Hog teachers.
What a coincidence! I’ve been out marching all day at the Embassy with my sign that reads on one side “Send us More Fernandos” and the other says “Moon-Faced Heifers Need Love Too”. I’m so tired.
Thanks for the post–maybe now the public will realize the crises we face if Pat Buchanan-like Nationalist Immigration polices become enacted…I’m sorry, I mean enforced.
Potfry,
That is hysterical.
Dan
It’s apparent that the Teacher’s Union is not providing the proper benefits to their members.
If you become a teacher you certainly should have the benefits of an under-aged concubine. If Americans won’t do it then someone will.
It just free market economics, healthy sex education and all.
Unbelievable! I have once again spewed a perfectly good cup of coffee all over the monitor. My boss is gonna charge me this time. Is this a business deduction?
Hey, I’d do her!