Alleged “shoebomber” Richard Reid recently told a reporter that although things have not been going very well for him, he sees a light at the end of the proverbial tunnel.

“I had a couple of good dreams about my situation changing for the better in the not too distant future so this is a blessing from Allah.”

TNOYF’s crack investigative team sat down with Mr. Reid and discovered the “Top 9 Ways Richard Reid Sees His Life Changing For The Better.”

9. Fun with food. The new prison menu was just released and- are you ready for this?- every other Tuesday is now “breakfast-for-dinner-night”.  What a sheer delight! Think of the hilarity in the juxtaposition of these meals! Pancakes and syrup after dark? Priceless. As detestable as I find them, these infidels have a creative streak a mile wide.

8. State-funded eye-care program takes effect next month. If I were ever to have any sort of eye problems- Allah forbid- they would now be covered by the Great Satan’s ocular henchmen.

7. A young love blossoms (Part I). Darnae in Cell Block D passed a note via fishing line saying he thinks I am “cute.” I have not yet responded as I am loathe to look too eager.

6. More sanitary conditions. Delousing’s have been changed from a monthly to a weekly schedule.

5. Literary progress. More time to work on my latest book, The Enigmatic Shoe: A Treatise on the Ignition and Flammability of Everyday Footwear.

4. One-flush efficiency. Allah pulled some strings with the warden, and I just discovered that I will be getting a new cell complete with an old school, high-volume prison toilet instead of the Al Gore issued one-pint capacity model I currently have. Yes, a new day is dawning for Richard Reid.

3. A young love blossoms (Part II). New halal fifi-bags have received prison approval.

2. Media exposure. I recently made the final cut of Trading Spaces: Supermax Edition. Before long I will have the opportunity to redecorate the cell of a Jewish white-collar criminal named Moshi. Clearly Allah has smiled upon me.

1. Lower susceptibility to anal rape. With 23 out of 24 hours a day spent in solitary confinement, I have a much better chance- statistically speaking- of being struck by lightning then of having my haram-hole violated.

The Nose On Your Face would like to thank our Top Referrers from the past week. Each of you has been entered in our Win A Dream Date With Wing contest. Good luck.

1. The Mudville Gazette
2. IMAO
3. Conservative Grapevine
4. Conservative Cat
5. Cranky Neocon
6. Conservative Edge
7. Marquette Warrior

Check out the Carnival of Comedy # 7 at IMAO.

Check out the Carnival of the Vanities at Conservative Edge.

(Thanks to Ash Web Blog for the pic.)

Thanks to our Top Referrers from this past week. Each of you has won a signed copy of the new Ann Coulter book Liberalism: Logic’s Retarded Cousin. Enjoy.

1. Conservative Grapevine
2. The Mudville Gazette
3. IMAO
4. The Conservative Cat
5. Iowahawk
6. Basil’s Blog
7. Outside the Beltway
8. The Jawa Report

Thanks again to all of our referrers and visitors who continue to help The Nose On Your Face grow.

Be sure to check out The Carnival of Comedy # 6 at IMAO.

The Nose On Your Face would like to thank our Top Referrers from this past week.

1. IMAO
2. The Mudville Gazette
3. Alarming News
4. Brainster
5. Right Wing News
6. The Conservative Cat
7. The Cranky Neocon

More importantly however, we would like to thank all of the brave men and women in our armed forces (past and present), who have sacrificed and continue to sacrifice so much for all of us.

It is because of you that we have the freedom to do what we do. Thank you all.

Some great tributes to our troops can be found all around the web today, but there are none better than what the Greyhawks have posted at The Mudville Gazette.

The Nose On Your Face would like to thank our Top Referrers from the past week.

1. IMAO
2. The Mudville Gazette
3. Comonwealth Conservative
4. The Conservative Cat
5. Outside the Beltway
6. Riehl World View
7. Brainster
8. Cranky Neocon

Be sure to visit the Fourth Carnival of Comedy at IMAO. It keeps getting better each week.

The Nose On Your Face would like to extend a sincere ‘thank you’ to this weeks Top Referrers. Unfortunately, the revenue generated from our ‘Google Ads’ is much less than we had hoped for so we will be unable to offer any fabulous prizes or witty commentary this week. Our apologies.

1. Right Wing News
2. IMAO
3. The Mudville Gazette
4. Cynical Nation
5. Outside The Beltway
6. The Conservative Cat
7. Basil’s Blog    
8. Point Five

We truly appreciate the support that we receive from all of our referrers and visitors. Thank you.

The Nose On Your Face would like to thank this past week’s Top Referrers. Each of you has won two grams of psychadelic mushrooms and the DVD “Sigmund and the Sea Monsters: The Complete First Season“. Use them together at your own risk.

1. IMAO- If you haven’t visited the 2nd Carnival of Comedy, make sure you do. This is a terrific compilation of funny stuff. Our favorite post was this one by Uncle Jimbo. Check out Right Wing Duck’s post on grammar here. 
2. Fresh Politics- Taylor W. Buley gives his take on the War on Drugs here.
3. The Mudville Gazette- Go here if you are interested in chatting live with Greyhawk and friends. It promises to be very interesting.
4. The Political Teen- (Site is currently down).
5. Right Wing Sparkle- Go help Sparkle caption this picture. Too funny.
6. Outside The Beltway- Check out this interesting post on the content of the recently seized Al Qaeda leader’s notebook.
7. Right Wing News- John Hawkins tackles the issue of Michael Jackson’s innocence on Q & A Friday.

Thanks again to all of our referrers and to everyone else that helps The Nose On Your Face grow.

(Thanks to Spooky Empire for the photo.)

The Nose On Your Face would like to extend a sincere “thank-you” to this week’s Top Referrer’s. We are pleased to announce that along with the honor of making this list, they will each receive a sweet low rider just like the one pictured.

1. IMAO- Go here to help wish Saddam Hussein a “Happy Birthday!”
2. The Mudville Gazette- Go here to find out what is happening on the front.
3. Ravings of John C. A. Bambenek- Visit John to find out the truth about the filibuster.
4. Right Wing Sparkle- When you visit her, be sure to help her caption this picture.
5. Outside The Beltway- If you like caption contests, click here to find a pretty complete list of the ones that are going on this weekend.
6. The Conservative Cat- If you want the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth so help you God (Are we still allowed to write the word God? We’ll have to check with with our friends at Stop the ACLU! ), then you have no choice but to click here.          
7. Cranky Neocon- Visit el Crankbo to find out Winnie the Pooh’s former moniker. I never realized that “Pooh” was not his given name.
8. The Political Teen- Click here to find out the answer to the age old question, “Is that burrito loaded?” 

While you are here please be sure to visit our sponsors in the left hand column. Our math is a bit rusty, but we are pretty sure that: More money=more funny (shameless capitalistic plug). Obviously we have very little money so you figure out the rest.

Thanks again and as always we appreciate your support.

The Nose On Your would like to thank our top referrers from this past week. As you can see, there were several ties among the top 7 slots. Competition to make the coveted “top referrers” list and claim valuable prizes is becoming increasingly stiff, so to earn your spot on this list you will really have to schlep this site.

This weeks top referrers have each won a copy of the sheet music from “Lamb Chop’s Special Chanukah!” A gezunt dir in pupik!

1. Conservative Dialysis- Click here to see why Nick reads the police blotter each morning.

2. The Mudville Gazette- Click here to find out some of the job perks Google employees receive.

3. Captain’s Quarters- Click here to learn more about the situation in Belarus.

4. (tie) Conservative Cat- Click here to find out more about the good omen Ferdinand received.

(tie) CrankyNeocon- Click here to get the inside scoop on the Wendy’s finger-in-the-chili incident. Why the authorities did not check with Gordon first is beyond us.

5.(tie) Outside The Beltway- Go here to read up on the latest John Kerry temper tantrum. The run up to 2008 should be as brutal as it is long.      

(tie) The Political Teen- Go here to see what is happening in blogs today.    

(tie) Am I A Pundit Now?- Go here for more Kerry whining.   

6. Blame Bush!- Go check out The Chimp That Stole Earthday. We laughed. We cried. We stir-fried a baby seal.

7. Freedom Stone - Go for the excellent products (this is one of our personal favorites). Stay for the recommended links.

Thanks again to everyone who visits our site and to all of our referrers. It is because of your support that The Nose On Your Face continues to grow each week at a pace that nearly outstrips Ted Kennedy’s scotch consumption. As always your comments are welcomed and encouraged.

(Thanks to www.sheetmusicco.com for the picture.)

Once again The Nose On Your Face would like to thank our top referrers from the past week. Each of this weeks top referrers will receive a months supply of Cafe de Colombia personally delivered by Juan Valdez and his trusty burro. Enjoy.

1. Captain’s Quarters- Click here to see, as Captain Ed describes it,  “a truly frightening display of speech suppression in Calgary. “
2. Mudville Gazette- Go here to check out the “Surge Alert”. More of the same from the MSM.
3. Professor Bainbridge- Be sure to go here to weigh in on the question: “Who is the greatest?” The Professor is right on this one. Wine lovers, be sure to check out his other blog (dedicated to wine tasting and collecting) as well.
4. The Conservative Cat- Check out Ferdinand’s thoughts on blog advertising here. This cat is starting to grow on us.
5. The Jawa Report- The few. The proud. The digital McCarthyites.
6. This Blog Is Full of Crap- Click here to see the “Flying Junior Jihadist“. Very disturbing. Be sure to check out the Avignon Edition of the 134th Carnival of the Vanities as well. Thanks to Laurence for taking the time to put it together.
7. Michelle Malkin- On a serious note, click here to help the family of Afghan toddler Qudratullah Wardak. Qudratullah died suddenly only two days after returning home from a successful heart surgery in the U.S.

Thanks as well to our regular, semi-regular and constipated visitors. Our “bookmark” visits continue to grow each week. We owe this to you and we appreciate your continued support.

The Nose On Your Face would like to thank our top referrers from this past week. Each of them will receive an official Democratic Party seal.

1. Incite- Go here to see a great example of how to host the Carnival of the Vanities (2 days ahead of schedule even).
2. Mudville Gazette- If you are like us and place spammers between hippies and bedsores on your “Things I Could Do Without” list, then you have to check out this article from Mrs. Greyhawk. Great precedent.
3. Conservative Cat- The staff at TNOYF all agree: Ferdinand compiles the best humor lists of anyone we know without opposable thumbs.    
4. Captain’s Quarters- Having just taken a trip recently, this post here strikes a particularly strong chord. As we witnessed an 80-something-year-old white woman in a wheelchair being questioned and frisked like a hardened criminal, we realized once again that common sense has not yet entered into the equation with regard to airline security in this country. Disgraceful.
5. Eric Berlin- Yeah Eric, this creeps us out as well.

6. Cranky Neocon- “Bi-polar and erratic”? Perhaps. Damn funny, clever and helpful to his friends? Absolutely. Go here to wish Gordon a happy one year anniversary. Keep up the great work and thanks for the continuing support and advice you give us. It is appreciated.

7. (Tie)Wuzzadem- Go for the riled-up bloggers. Stay for the Top 10 List.

    7.   (Tie)My Vast Right Wing Conspiracy- Go here to check out Beth’s “South Park Gallery” and “Comment Game.” By the way, we just added MVRWC to our Noseworthy Sites list.

Thanks again to all of our Top Referrers and to everyone who visits The Nose On Your Face. As always your comments and suggestions are welcome. Of course, we will dismiss all suggestions out of hand, but they are still welcome.

(Note: We found the Democratic Seal used in today’s post a while ago and do not remember where we got it from. If anyone knows the source, please let us know so that we can give credit.)

The Nose On Your Face would like to extend a sincere congratulations to our Top Referrers from this past week. There is a nice combination of new and familiar names this time around. This weeks winners have each won two tickets to the hilarious new Muslim musical, Allah, Allah Oxen Free! now playing on Broadway.

1. Eric Berlin- Eric did a bang-up job of hosting The Carnival of the Vanities. The amount of effort that goes into hosting the carnival must be enormous. Check out some of his other writings when you go.
2. Right Wing Sparkle- Click here to see another example of tolerance on the left.
3. The Mudville Gazette- Click here to help them count up the dead bad guys who attacked Abu Ghraib and to see yet another example of the even-handedness of the MSM.
4. Cranky Neocon- Go here to help ease Gordon’s pain at the untimely loss of a man who did so much to help race relations and who so strongly supported the rights of women to have their heads lopped off.
5. National Summary- Click here to read an excellent tribute to the Pope.
6. Pirate’s Cove- Go here to help William rid our society of leeches. No one likes leeches so go help him. Go on.
7. Conservative Cat- Someone out there thought The Nose On Your Face was funny. At least this once.

We here at The Nose On Your Face continue to appreciate the support of both our referrers and our readers. Thanks again.

Buckley F. Williams, Senior Editor

The Nose On Your Face would like to extend a sincere thanks to our Top Referrers from this past week. This weeks winners will receive lifelike action figures of The Wonder Twins and Gleek as well as “scuba driving” lessons from one of our nation’s longest serving senators.

1. The Mudville Gazette- Mudville is fast becoming one of TNOYF’s favorite sites. Their posts on the military remain first rate and they go out of their way to give tips for new and/or smaller bloggers. Click here to see their “front-line blog of the day.”
2. Code Blue Blog- These guys did an outstanding job of hosting the 131st Carnival of the Vanities. If you have not seen it yet, go here to check it out.
3. Cranky Neocon- Click here to find out more about the sexist pig who operates this site.
4. Basil’s Blog- Go for the lunch specials. Stay for the gnomes.
5. Brainster-  He’s traveling right now and nobody better steal anything from his site while he’s gone. Brainster has been on the front lines with TNOYF in trying to expose the horrific attack on the Easter Bunny that occurred last week.

6. The Jawa Report- South Park in Iraq. Gay Republicans being outed. A Colonel Klink reference. All that’s missing is a link to The Nose On Your Face (shameless plug). Best of all, Dr. Rusty Shackleford chose yours truly, Buckley F. Williams, as the winner of last weeks caption contest. Check it out here.

7. National Summary- Go to this site. Go often. Read. In particular, check out their article on the history of Israel and Palestine (here).

Thanks to our top referrers and to all of our visitors who continue to help The Nose On Your Face grow.

Buckley F. Williams, Senior Editor

The Nose On Your Face would once again like to thank our top referrers from last week. This weeks winners will be receiving an autographed syringe from Barry Bonds (apparently never used) and an aging hippie (please choose just one).

1. Right Wing News- John Hawkins displays a touching show of support for a much exploited and underrepresented minority: cheerleaders (March 18th).
2. Brainster- Check out yet another example of the left taking the moral high-ground (March 18th) at his site.
3. The Therapist- The good Doctor provides details of some encouraging new developments for victim Scott Peterson.
4. Basil’s Blog- This man knows how to take care of a woman who has been injured in a cockfight.
5. National Summary- They let us know that Big Brother is watching. Right now. Wherever you are. Hey! He saw that.
6. Cranky Neocon- Can you pick the real anti-American quotes from the fake ones? We couldn’t.
7. Right Wing Sparkle- She has a great photo up on her site of Condi Rice hugging The Rock’s big brother. Check it out and caption it for her.

Definitely check these sites out. And as always, thanks to everyone for helping The Nose On Your Face grow.

Buckley F. Williams, Senior Editor

The Nose On Your Face would like to thank our top referrers from last week and as always there are some great prizes for making the list. This weeks top referrers each get an autographed picture of Carrot Top (8×10 glossy- very nice!) and an AMC Gremlin (sorry ladies, the fella in the photo is spoken for).

(Tie) The Therapist- He is the only man, as far as we can tell, bringing to light the good things that corporations do in Africa. We laughed. We cried. We shooed imaginary flies. And thanks for the recent nod. Visit him and make sure he has been taking his medication.

(Tie) Basil’s Blog- Visit his site, but don’t be fooled by his innocent looking photo. Behind the smiles and poopy diapers lurks a bloodthirsty, blog-jacking buccaneer.

RightNation.us- Great compilation of articles from a variety of sources. Definitely check it out.

National Summary- One of the first sites to recognize TNOYF’s existence. Check out the site in general and the article “It’s George Bush’s Fault” in particular. It explains a great deal.

Right Wing Sparkle- This young lady’s likes include: rodeos, country music and bare-chested, possibly doctored photos of George W. Bush. Big supporter of TNOYF since day 1.

Google- To be honest with you, this site sent us a fair amount of traffic but we  found it a bit lame. It’s almost all white. There is no comment area. And they are all about “searching” for things. Too existential for us. Overall, not a must visit.

Please take the time to visit our top referrers. And as always, thanks to everyone for helping The Nose On Your Face Grow.

Buckley F. Williams, Senior Editor