Only days after President Obama sought out “ass to kick” in the wake of the British Petroleum oil spill, he continued to unleash his fury, this time at those responsible for America’s spiraling debt and out of control spending.
“I have a message for the people who have been spending your tax dollars like drunken sailors: there’s a 50-gallon drum of whoop-ass waiting at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue,” said Obama, “and I’m gonna be doling out force-fed tap hits from here on out. The Chairman of BP, Rush Limbaugh, hell, Chuck Norris too. Anybody wants a piece of this, I’m right here, baby.”"
Obama went on to note that his administration has been way out in front on the issues of ass-kickings, beatdowns, thrashings, pummelings, and smackdowns, as well as overspending and rising debt.
“We have held multiple high-level meetings at the White Hosue with a distinguished team of financial experts from all different ideological perspectives,” said the president. “Simultaneously, we have convened a multi-disciplinary team of badass motherf****s to deal with those responsible for this country’s economic troubles.”
While Obama refused to release full preliminary findings, he did allow that the main culprit’s name “rhymes with Forge Zubayoo Mush.”
